June 24 2013

Hello!

I'm getting ready to go to my nieces bridal shower. It's been a pretty good week. I've tried some new foods..kept some down. Tried my favorite quiche again and it just didn't work for me..I think I'm one of those people that just can't eat eggs with my lap band :(
It sucks because eggs are so rich in protein.

I'm still not seeing much movement in the scale. We joined the gym I think three weeks ago now. We don't go every day but every few days. I have made it 20 min. on the bike. I am trying for 30. I work up a sweat and feel it the next day so I think I'm doing it right ha!

I still have not broken the bad habit I picked up at my dads in February of eating candy again. It goes down so good!! I have tried only  picking up weight watchers candy or skinny cow but some how M&M's jump in my  cart too. This will power thing is the pits for me. I'm  not too concerned about it..my attitude has stayed pretty steady from the beginning about not beating myself up and taking it a day at a time. I do stress about the doctor visits thou. I know he'll not be happy when I go back in July and the scale is the same..ugh!

We are going to St Pete Pride tomorrow..maybe I'll sweat off some pounds :)

Have a great week!

What a difference a year makes

I was just looking at my other blog (WhatHollyHasSeen) and realized that it has been one year this month since I first looked into getting the lap band surgery.

It took me four months from the time I looked into it first until I was able to complete the classes and doctor visits to actually have the surgery.

I am now 8 months out from having the surgery and down almost 40 pounds. I should be down more but I've been struggling since February when my dad died. I think I am back on track and have joined a gym this month so I should start losing again..in a positive way of thinking at least I have not gained any weight back! :)

It is definitely a commitment you must make, if I don't do the work I won't lose the weight. I can no longer enjoy a pizza, a hamburger, soft pretzels..bread. But I do enjoy looking in the mirror and seeing less of me. Being noticed again and not feeling invisible ...:) and the best is knowing it's only going to get better!

Happy June! I'll try and do a video later , it's been too long and I need to catch up with all of you on youtube that I've been watching your journeys..you are all an inspiration to me!

Joined YouFit

Today we joined a gym. We didn't actually work out yet, but we did join. We will go again tomorrow and actually work out..this stuff takes time ya know :)

Happy June!

After my last post I went back to the doctor and he took out 1 cc in my band-making it now at 5 cc's. I have been able to eat again -not an entire steak or anything but I can get 3-4 bites before feeling stuck.

I'm still working on drinking more water, eating less junk/slider foods and going for protein first. It's hard, I know I've slipped back into some old/bad habits  and only I can change    and get back on track.

This is Vic's last week of Physical Therapy so we'll be joining a gym soon and getting back to a more normal schedule hopefully. I know that I could go do that on my own but I think I'll go more with her and having someone to go with is more fun!

It's about this time last year that I started thinking about getting the lap band surgery. I remember going to a family 4th of July party saying it would be my last "fat" holiday. How silly I was to think it would all just fall off after surgery. Even after all the classes and everything I still thought it would be easier than it has been and didn't account for all the work I'd have to do along the way to get the numbers that I want.

It's a Struggle

Today is 7 months, 6 days since I had the lap band surgery. And almost a year now since I started looking into having it done. When I started I weighted 234 pounds, today I weight 196 making that 38 pounds lost. I  was pretty happy three months ago when I hit 197 but then my dad died and my motivation and eating habits went to hell. I snacked on candy and junk food again after being so good for months . I gave myself a break at first and figured it would run its course and work out and blamed it on stress. Truth be told I am sure it was/is emotional eating.

I went in for my regular check up with the doctor last Thursday. I didn't want another fill because I already could not eat very much but more than I should be able to eat according to what I learned in my classes prior to surgery. He wasn't very sympathetic and told me that I need to do what I was taught..three bites. Chicken, meat, fish..that's it. No salads, no slider foods. He gave me another fill making it 6cc's now in my band. (I think my band will hold 10 ccs)

This has been a trying 5 days! I can finally really only eat three bites! Even my protein shake makes me feel crappy and too full. If I eat that fourth bite I am off to the bathroom to throw it up (TMI..sorry). Good news is Ive lost another pound since my doctor visit Thursday. Bad news is not being able to eat makes me very cranky! I have a feeling seeing the scale go down more will make me get over the crankiness ...we shall see.

I worry a little about dehydration and not getting enough nutrients ..I mean how could I possibly with three bites of protein and a protein shake a day? It explains the weight loss but how healthy is this?? I am taking my vitamins and my hair isn't falling out as much as before..at least not that I notice as much. I am having little bits of feelings of wondering if this was the right decision for me. In my logical brain I think it was. I was way over weight and nothing was working. I was very unhealthy and my quality of life was being effected in ways I didn't even realize until I started losing the weight. I think once I get past this bump in the road I will again think that I made the right decision but on days like this when I can't  eat, can't even imagine going out to eat ever again without worrying about embarrassing myself it's a hard call.  I'm giving myself a few more days and if I'm still struggling as much I think I will go back and have him take back out 1cc of fluid from my band. Maybe this was the wake up call I needed to get back on track?

Video update 5/2/2013

yay, it looks like my webcam on my laptop is working again!

Time flies

I can't believe it's been a month since I posted on here. So much for my daily /weekly updates. I just have been in a creative funk since my dad passed in February.  The scale has stayed pretty much the same at 197/198/199.  I am pleased that it has not jumped back up into the 2's but really disappointed that it's not continued to go lower, but the only one to blame is me. I still have not exercised but am getting closer..the YouFit gym down the street from me is open now and I think after Vic is recovered more from knee surgery we will be joining.

 I've discovered that my lap band reacts to stress. For the most part I have not been able to keep most foods down. Occasionally I do but not as often as I'd like. I know that I eat too fast and take bigger bites than I should and that is something I just always have to work on. I'm not just talking about foods that shouldn't work..I was making Vic a sandwich yesterday and munched on Swiss cheese and a piece of ham and it got stuck. My problem is that a lot of bad foods (candy, ice cream, etc.) always go down just fine so when I have a bad episode with good foods I follow up with bad to fulfil that eating sensation. I have learned for the most part to only buy skinny cow candy and other more diet friendly sweets (sugar free, etc.)

Foods that work for me (most) of the time..meatballs,soup,chicken nuggets,chicken Caesar salad, chef salad, cheese, protein bars,chicken but not fried chicken, very thin pizza-I order the ones with the most meat and only eat a piece or two..if it's not thin it doesn't work, sometimes tacos work but sometimes they don't, chili,buffalo chicken wraps but I usually have to get rid of most of the "wrap" and just eat the chicken. I'm always trying new things but going out to a restaurant is not much fun for me anymore because I never know what my reaction to food is going to be.

Easter Sunday was awful. I went to a place that I usually love with Vic and Victor and ordered quiche but they didn't have my regular one so I got one with meat and peppers (too spicy) and I was only able to get one or two bites and I was running off to the bathroom to get sick. :(   I find it much easier to just bring food home or go to the same places that I know have things that work for me over and over.

It's been six months and a few weeks since I've been banded and I would not change it. I tried dieting on my own and never had the success that lasted like this band does. I know that I will keep losing weight and I know that once I add exercise I will do fantastic! For now I'm happy with the 37 lbs lost and enjoy looking in the mirror again.

I have a feeling May is going to be the month that turns this year around. No more sadness ..moving up and moving on to a thinner, healthier me!